She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
TSA doesn’t allow handcuffs in carryon bags. Super fun they confiscated them in front of my boss and coworker.
Randomize
