You work out of a Hotel?
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
I'm sobbing to NWA
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
Randomize
