its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
Randomize
