I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
So I've decided that when I turn 50 and have to have a colonoscopy I'm going to leave a surprise for the doctor to find.
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
Maybe he injected his testicle?
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
It's shark week go big or go home
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
Randomize
