he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
Randomize
