So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
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