he puts the penis in happiness.
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
Randomize
