we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
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