She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
Randomize
