The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
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