somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
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