Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
I still don’t believe you, the dog DID NOT tear down the shower curtain and shit on the floor.. we found you in the fetal position in the bathroom holding your tequila gun. It was you!
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
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