and next time when you feel me up, do it right
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
Randomize
