Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
They told me I spent half the night at the club with one ball hanging out my shorts. Apparently it got me 1 free drink, 2 numbers, and thrown out.
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
Probably some sort of karmic revenge for me looking at titties somewhere along the way
and for that you shall suffer
God: I won't strike you down, but I shall introduce your child to Doja Cat during a quarantine
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