Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
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