So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
Randomize