The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
Is that strawberry winking at me??
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