I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
Randomize
