so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
The bartender just asked me if I owned stock in Jameson. I've been here for less than an hour and he's already judging me.
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
Randomize
