is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Randomize
