I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
Why is your signature on my underwear?
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
Times have changed. Freshman year I could throw my shirt in a bonfire and still get laid. Now when I puke in my girlfriend's bed on her birthday I'm "an asshole"
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
Randomize
