Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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