Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
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he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
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I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.