It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
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