Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
Randomize
