I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
my mom just threw water on me to get me awake and is screaming "where is my fucking car?!"
you gave me a ride last nite what the hell did you do with it after you left me?
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
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