I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
Never let your siblings swipe right.
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
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