All I want to do is go home, strip down to my pants, get in the shower and pee down my leg
Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
Apparently you make a good broom.
You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize