do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
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