I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
Randomize
