get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
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