You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
Randomize