so let's talk penis.
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
Randomize
