Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
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