You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
I'm gonna have to start putting baby wipes and a change of pants in my bag. The amount of times I'm scared of shitting my pants in public is too high and I need the reassurance
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize