im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
Randomize
