I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
Randomize
