It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
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