At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
I was fine until "Under Pressure" came on the radio. It's like God wanted me to shit my pants on the drive home.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
He's drunk and I'm pain-killer high and we're about to watch fireworks at disney world. It's gonna be fucking magical
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
Damn victory sex feels great
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