Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
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