yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
i'm at a stripclub and this bitch just lit her nipples on fire!
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
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