Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
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