What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
Randomize
