I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
While leaving the bar with another guy I told the bouncer I was sad his friend had a fiancee
You were drinking Everclear weren't you?
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
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