i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Randomize
