I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
So then we ended up at a bar full of navy SEALs and I got one of them to take his shirt off, then I felt him up
I feel like 31-year old me is 21-year old me's hero
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
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