She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
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