Texts From Last Night

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  (586): View more from Michigan

  Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy

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  (586): Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy http://tfl.nu/kc5d
  Replies (3) Good night (935) Bad night (419)
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  (313): View more from Michigan

  i jhust puked up my retainher.

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  (313): i jhust puked up my retainher. http://tfl.nu/zdlf
  Replies (3) Good night (663) Bad night (1280)
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  (330): View more from Ohio

  so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.

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  (330): so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv. http://tfl.nu/d9vr
  Replies (61) Good night (2172) Bad night (592)
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  (614): View more from Ohio

  So this text is costing me two dollars because I'm out of the country, but I just wanted to let you know it went well with the stripper last night

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  (614): So this text is costing me two dollars because I'm out of the country, but I just wanted to let you know it went well with the stripper last night http://tfl.nu/bxgc
  Replies (13) Good night (6541) Bad night (621)
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  (218): View more from Minnesota

  I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.

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  (218): I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it. http://tfl.nu/fsad
  Replies (42) Good night (6820) Bad night (1993)
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  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand

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  (202): I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand http://tfl.nu/1ole
  Replies (8) Good night (4188) Bad night (972)
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  (812): View more from Indiana

  He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.

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  (812): He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow. http://tfl.nu/zftg
  Replies (8) Good night (951) Bad night (3511)
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  (417): View more from Missouri

  woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.

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  (417): woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before. http://tfl.nu/td38
  Replies (4) Good night (1485) Bad night (516)
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  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?

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  (724): My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's? http://tfl.nu/cp3t
  Replies (14) Good night (2512) Bad night (621)
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  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me

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  (814): the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me http://tfl.nu/xcf9
  Replies (13) Good night (1383) Bad night (476)
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  (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face

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  (403): i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face http://tfl.nu/onze
  Replies (11) Good night (976) Bad night (534)
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  (+31): View more from The Netherlands

  Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.

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  (+31): Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming. http://tfl.nu/ki11
  Replies (4) Good night (1896) Bad night (280)
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  (661): View more from California

  This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.

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  (661): This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas. http://tfl.nu/nydy
  Replies (4) Good night (663) Bad night (391)
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  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  Drugs are gluten free tho, right?

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  (508): Drugs are gluten free tho, right? http://tfl.nu/186e
  Replies (5) Good night (622) Bad night (242)
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  (601): View more from Mississippi

  I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.

  (1-601): View more from Mississippi

  It's a short, short story.

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  (601): I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex. (1-601): It's a short, short story. http://tfl.nu/1rzv
  Replies (1) Good night (262) Bad night (661)

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