Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
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