is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
the only good thing about breaking up with him while naked was that i got to make a forgetting sarah marshall reference
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
She shows up drunk at 3am for sex and then punches me straight in the eye in the middle of it because "you're too nice."
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
PANTIES FOUND
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