New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
Randomize
